Today marks CD13. I have three follicles on the right ovary- they measured at 27.4mm, 22.8, & 22.1. My lining was at 9.2mm which resolved my concerns over the clomid affecting my endometrium. The left ovary was lazy, but that's okay. Three big, fat, follicles is plenty for me.
Dr. Awesome thought my LH surge may have already started with how big my follicles are. I had some lines on the OPK yesterday but nothing that was positive by test standards. I tested 3x daily from CD10-12. Anyway, Dr. A was in a hurry for us to get some BD on since we didn't want to miss our window. We triggered even though he wasn't sure it was necessary. Last BD session was Sunday after a 72 hour break, so that should have gotten some good swimmers in there. Today was icing, although the break may not have been long enough for the sperm count to be good (40hrs, we test best at 60-72 hours). (There was conversation over if it was worth doing a LH blood test, but I'd possibly have to trigger anyway and the blood test costs as much as the trigger- so why not skip it since the trigger won't cause any interference with ovulation even it it has started.)
Hubs ran home from school and we managed to get a quickie in. That's all it takes, right? While he rushed back to school, I propped up my rear for 30 minutes.
We truly are that comedic infertile couple the movies depict. . . *sigh*.
Here's hoping tomorrow shows a temperature spike.
Showing posts with label clomid. Show all posts
Showing posts with label clomid. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
16dpo and Progesterone Hang Over
Ugh. . . I hate the waiting game. These darn medicated cycles drag out longer and longer. We learned last cycle, when I conceived that a home test at 15dpo was negative and at 18dpo it was positive. . . was this because it wasn't a viable pregnancy, or is that how my body rolls? Who knows. . . so I have to wait out until 18dpo this round on progesterone. If I test negative then, I can stop the progesterone and wait for my next cycle to start.
Trouble is. . . I feel like crap. I have a killer migraine. I'm so darn tired. This could be the progesterone. . . who knows. I've taken two tests, at 14dpo and 15dpo. I skipped today. . . maybe I'll test tomorrow. I went by the Dollar Tree and picked up 7 of the Assured tests. I used these in my conception cycle along with First Response Early Detection (the most sensitive on the market). The Assured Dollar Tree test also showed positive when my HCG was only 18 and continued to show it when my HCG dropped over the next couple of days. This tells me they are super sensitive and why waste the big bucks? (The First Response also showed positive.)
I have to decide if I want to shell out the $450 to have a base line scan once AF does show up. . . if so, then I can have another medicated cycle (oh the joys!). If not, we do nothing and see. . . of course, we conceived on the non-medicated cycle but my progesterone was low and that bambino didn't stick. . . so who knows.
I asked if I can skip the baseline scan and just go ahead with clomid again. . . I know my body so well, I'd know if I have a cyst (ovulation nearly makes me cry. . . seriously). They said no because they recently had one lady who tested negative. . . had what looked like AF. . . came in for her baseline scan only to find out she was actually pregnant. I guess better safe than sorry is the story here, right?
Trouble is. . . I feel like crap. I have a killer migraine. I'm so darn tired. This could be the progesterone. . . who knows. I've taken two tests, at 14dpo and 15dpo. I skipped today. . . maybe I'll test tomorrow. I went by the Dollar Tree and picked up 7 of the Assured tests. I used these in my conception cycle along with First Response Early Detection (the most sensitive on the market). The Assured Dollar Tree test also showed positive when my HCG was only 18 and continued to show it when my HCG dropped over the next couple of days. This tells me they are super sensitive and why waste the big bucks? (The First Response also showed positive.)
I have to decide if I want to shell out the $450 to have a base line scan once AF does show up. . . if so, then I can have another medicated cycle (oh the joys!). If not, we do nothing and see. . . of course, we conceived on the non-medicated cycle but my progesterone was low and that bambino didn't stick. . . so who knows.
I asked if I can skip the baseline scan and just go ahead with clomid again. . . I know my body so well, I'd know if I have a cyst (ovulation nearly makes me cry. . . seriously). They said no because they recently had one lady who tested negative. . . had what looked like AF. . . came in for her baseline scan only to find out she was actually pregnant. I guess better safe than sorry is the story here, right?
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Early Miscarriage and Moving On
No one warned me that a miscarriage at 5 1/2 weeks would be quite so nasty. I assumed (and no one told me differently) that it would be similar to a late menses. . I expected heavier bleeding than I would have with a normal 28-30 day non conception cycle. I did not expect the amount of tissue and clotting that happened (thankfully mostly all at once). It is quite an emotional experience to be sitting in the bathroom and find globs of what you know should be a baby growing inside your belly. . . enough said.
I've shed a few tears. . .but I'm trying to remember that there is nothing we can change about losing this pregnancy and I'm grateful the loss was so early (instead of the 9 week ultrasound my friend just had which revealed no heartbeat or the 21 week umbilical cord separation that another friend suffered a few years ago). If I hadn't broken down and taken a test (because, duh, I was 18dpo and every RE on the planet says- "18dpo and temps are still up, you are pregnant" unless of course you aren't and just have an awesome progesterone producing cyst) I wouldn't have even known I was actually, finally, pregnant.
But I digress.
We are moving in. . . because we have no other choice. My RE encouraged us to try for 2-3 cycles on our own (possibly with ovulation help) since he felt so confident about my weight loss/dietary changes and the impact that would have on my fertility. Evidently he was right. . . the combination did allow us to conceive, finally. Prayerfully, we will conceive again quickly and have a sticky baby.
Because my progesterone was so low this time (6.28), we are taking clomid on CD5-9 (normally I take clomid CD3-7 but we had to wait for my final beta hcg, so today it is). I'm taking 150mg as usual. We will not be using a trigger, just timing intercourse well. I'm suppose to use an ovulation predictor kit to help make sure that happens. What I learned last cycle is that spacing BD did make a big difference. . . so darling hubs will be getting his groove on only every 2-3 days until ovulation is confirmed since we know daily BD depletes the swimmers. This last cycle we got BD in 16x's in 32 days (which is still a lot) vs. our normal 30+ times. And it's the first cycle we managed to get swimmer and egg together. . . 'nuff said.
Once ovulation is confirmed, I will be starting progesterone suppositories (half 100mg 2x daily) until negative beta. . . if we get a positive, then I will continue the progesterone for at least 12 weeks.
In the past when my progesterone has been checked at 7dpo, it's been decent (15-20) on medicated cycles. . we haven't tested it in unmedicated cycles but my luteal phase and temps have been pretty good which normally is an indicator of happy progesterone.
We won't be attempting anymore treatment until at least October when our FSA resets and at this time we are still up in the air as to whether it'll be more IUI with injectables or onto IVF. IVF is a hard one for me given what I believe about creation of life. . .but it's amazing what we can convince ourselves to do in order to have a child. I'm praying we won't have to make that decision.
I've shed a few tears. . .but I'm trying to remember that there is nothing we can change about losing this pregnancy and I'm grateful the loss was so early (instead of the 9 week ultrasound my friend just had which revealed no heartbeat or the 21 week umbilical cord separation that another friend suffered a few years ago). If I hadn't broken down and taken a test (because, duh, I was 18dpo and every RE on the planet says- "18dpo and temps are still up, you are pregnant" unless of course you aren't and just have an awesome progesterone producing cyst) I wouldn't have even known I was actually, finally, pregnant.
But I digress.
We are moving in. . . because we have no other choice. My RE encouraged us to try for 2-3 cycles on our own (possibly with ovulation help) since he felt so confident about my weight loss/dietary changes and the impact that would have on my fertility. Evidently he was right. . . the combination did allow us to conceive, finally. Prayerfully, we will conceive again quickly and have a sticky baby.
Because my progesterone was so low this time (6.28), we are taking clomid on CD5-9 (normally I take clomid CD3-7 but we had to wait for my final beta hcg, so today it is). I'm taking 150mg as usual. We will not be using a trigger, just timing intercourse well. I'm suppose to use an ovulation predictor kit to help make sure that happens. What I learned last cycle is that spacing BD did make a big difference. . . so darling hubs will be getting his groove on only every 2-3 days until ovulation is confirmed since we know daily BD depletes the swimmers. This last cycle we got BD in 16x's in 32 days (which is still a lot) vs. our normal 30+ times. And it's the first cycle we managed to get swimmer and egg together. . . 'nuff said.
Once ovulation is confirmed, I will be starting progesterone suppositories (half 100mg 2x daily) until negative beta. . . if we get a positive, then I will continue the progesterone for at least 12 weeks.
In the past when my progesterone has been checked at 7dpo, it's been decent (15-20) on medicated cycles. . we haven't tested it in unmedicated cycles but my luteal phase and temps have been pretty good which normally is an indicator of happy progesterone.
We won't be attempting anymore treatment until at least October when our FSA resets and at this time we are still up in the air as to whether it'll be more IUI with injectables or onto IVF. IVF is a hard one for me given what I believe about creation of life. . .but it's amazing what we can convince ourselves to do in order to have a child. I'm praying we won't have to make that decision.
Monday, April 9, 2012
What's Next?
Our "rest" cycle ended on Saturday with the arrival of AF. Oh the joys. I did O, it looks like CD16 with a positive OPK on CD15. Things get confusing because I had a big temp rise on CD14, dip on CD15 and it rose again on CD16. My LP seems to confirm a CD16 O. So, there it is.
Despite great timing of the baby dance, the use of Pre~Seed and Guaifenesin we had no luck. 16 cycles down without even the faintest of a positive pee stick.
I was really tempted to take another rest cycle. . . in fact, I waffled all the way up until I picked up my clomid prescription at 7pm tonight (CD3 and day 1 of clomid). I decided I would take clomid CD3-7 (150mg), have a scan on CD12 and do a trigger shot. Then we will do timed intercourse and pray for the best. This cycle will only cost about $500 (which insurance will cover half of) since we are having 1 scan instead of 2 and no IUI/sperm prep. Typical cycles have been running $1200 + meds.
We have an IVF consult scheduled for May 2nd. This is a "what if?" appointment. . . it's not a set in stone this is what we are doing thing. I'm still not sure we can afford it (or justify the cost if we decide we have the cash), and I'm not sure I'm morally willing to go there.
We are also on the wait list for donor embryos. This is a pretty cost effective option at our clinic. There are no legal fees (embryos are surrendered to the clinic for adoption). It costs $3800 + meds for one cycle (vs. $8850 + meds for one stimulation cycle). The problem is that the wait list is long (two+ years). For us, it's good that the wait list is long as hubs isn't sure he is on board with the idea. I figure if we still haven't conceived by the time our names come up on the list, he will probably be much more open to the idea. And once we've been given embryos, we don't have to transfer right away. . . we can wait for a while and even pass up the chance to the next couple if we decide against it.
So, that's where we are at. I honestly cannot believe that we aren't pregnant yet. Last Easter, we were a few months into our TTC journey and I was convinced we would have a wonderful Easter surprise. Instead, AF visited. Here we are a year later with the same outcome. This infertility journey has lasted longer than my first round (baby #1 took 12 cycles). Granted, I was a dozen years younger and the only apparent issue was anovulation. Now we have a whole host of "issues". Awesome.
Despite great timing of the baby dance, the use of Pre~Seed and Guaifenesin we had no luck. 16 cycles down without even the faintest of a positive pee stick.
I was really tempted to take another rest cycle. . . in fact, I waffled all the way up until I picked up my clomid prescription at 7pm tonight (CD3 and day 1 of clomid). I decided I would take clomid CD3-7 (150mg), have a scan on CD12 and do a trigger shot. Then we will do timed intercourse and pray for the best. This cycle will only cost about $500 (which insurance will cover half of) since we are having 1 scan instead of 2 and no IUI/sperm prep. Typical cycles have been running $1200 + meds.
We have an IVF consult scheduled for May 2nd. This is a "what if?" appointment. . . it's not a set in stone this is what we are doing thing. I'm still not sure we can afford it (or justify the cost if we decide we have the cash), and I'm not sure I'm morally willing to go there.
We are also on the wait list for donor embryos. This is a pretty cost effective option at our clinic. There are no legal fees (embryos are surrendered to the clinic for adoption). It costs $3800 + meds for one cycle (vs. $8850 + meds for one stimulation cycle). The problem is that the wait list is long (two+ years). For us, it's good that the wait list is long as hubs isn't sure he is on board with the idea. I figure if we still haven't conceived by the time our names come up on the list, he will probably be much more open to the idea. And once we've been given embryos, we don't have to transfer right away. . . we can wait for a while and even pass up the chance to the next couple if we decide against it.
So, that's where we are at. I honestly cannot believe that we aren't pregnant yet. Last Easter, we were a few months into our TTC journey and I was convinced we would have a wonderful Easter surprise. Instead, AF visited. Here we are a year later with the same outcome. This infertility journey has lasted longer than my first round (baby #1 took 12 cycles). Granted, I was a dozen years younger and the only apparent issue was anovulation. Now we have a whole host of "issues". Awesome.
Monday, March 12, 2012
Cycle 4 FAIL ... Time to Rest
Cycle 4 came to a screeching halt this past Thursday. I already knew we weren't pregnant, but like every infertile, I was holding out hope until AF showed.
To add insult to injury... DD and I were at a marriage conference at a beautiful resort this weekend. I had "my friend" the entire weekend... UGH. AND every single session of the conference, no matter where we sat in the ballroom... I was surrounded by pregnant women.
I'm happy for these women... I really am. I don't know a single thing about their stories. Did they conceive the first month of trying after spending their entire adulthood avoiding pregnancy? Did they struggle with infertility? Were they "surprised" by this pregnancy? Wanted, unwanted, planned, unplanned, 1st baby or 12th?... they all have what I long for. I feel guilty for being jealous of their pregnant state.
Sometimes, I feel unjustified in my hurt over infertility. I did bring 3 beautiful children into this world and I gained 2 more via marriage to Devoted Daddy. I am the Mama to 5 kiddos... I will always be insanely busy... I will never have to make the choice to "live child free"... I fit in during the parenting sessions of the conference... I'm an infertile with a full nest.
And I'm still incredibly sad. I long for a child that I can look at and not see my ex or DD's ex... a child that I can look at and see the reflection of this man I love above all else. This man who is my glorious gift after so many years of destruction and heartbreak. I long for a child that will provide all of our children with a joint sibling... a child that will "close the circle" between His and Hers. I would desire these things even if I didn't absolutely adore children... if I didn't love the feeling of being pregnant (even though I was violently ill every time)... if I didn't believe that children are a blessing...
Devoted Daddy is convinced that we will have a baby together in time... I'm losing hope. I know that God is real... and that He is good. I also know that we live in a fallen world where bad things happen. Maybe God's plan for us is to love the orphans... to foster and adopt children that are unwanted... maybe God's plan is that I need to learn patience and that things don't come in my timing...
Or maybe, we just have the rotten luck of faulty plumbing. I've put my reproductive organs through all kinds of trauma since my first bout of (resolved) infertility.
In other news, I asked to be added to our clinic's embryo adoption program. The wait is long (two years or more) because there are many waiting families and not many embryos available. DD and I know that enlarging our family via embryo adoption would mean that the resulting child(ren) would not be of our DNA, but we would be granting life to a child suspended in time... and we would love that child(ren) with every fiber of our being. The irony is... we can go through a FET with adopted embryos for $3800 whereas a round of IVF would cost us $8850 + $2-3,000 in meds.
On my mind... IVF. It was something I wasn't sure I'd ever seriously consider. BUT, here we are... four failed cycles later. We are resting for at least this cycle, maybe two depending on finances. I've crunched the numbers... we have about $2500 left in insurance benefits and on October 1 our FSA account starts over. We could increase that to the maximum which is $5,000 (annually). This would enable us to have $7500 toward the $8850 cost of IVF in October (two months prior to my dreaded 35th birthday). IF (and it's a big IF) we can save the remaining $1350 and start rounding up the medications... maybe, just maybe... we could give it a go. If round one doesn't work BUT we have embryos remaining, we could wait a couple months and pay $1250 for a FET.
I know without a doubt, that even if we conceived triplets on IVF #1, we'd have to proceed with FET of any remaining embryos at the earliest possible time. I cannot allow the start of life to stay indefinitely suspended in time or be destroyed. We'd have to give every embryo (no matter the quality) a shot at life. Our only other option would be embryo adoption... but I think I'm one of those women that is attached to my eggs and would have a great sense of loss over allowing them to be raised in another family... and if none became children, I'd wonder if they would have had a different outcome if I had chosen to transfer them... Because I'm crazy like that. :-)
I have a prescription here for 10 vials (75iu) of Menopur + 15 clomid pills + 10,000iu of Pregnyl. I can buy the Menopur cheaply via IVFMEDS.com for $187.50, this is about a fourth of the cost of an American pharmacy. My clinic recommends the generic HMG and even gave me the order form, so I am comfortable using it.
However, I have to make a decision... try Menopur + clomid + HCG (in April or May) with IUI and potentially waste another $1500... or wait and save... and pray and hope...
Either way... I'm taking March off. Who knows, maybe we will get lucky on our own. I started the OPK today (First Response Daily), I like that this kit watches (and remembers) my personal levels of LH to detect my surge... since I have a short (and possibly weak) surge this is a good thing. I'm also diligently tracking my BBT, cervix position and CM. By taking March off, I can skip the day 3 ultrasound at my clinic and shave $470 off the next cycle. My RE only requires baselines in back to back medicated cycles.
Our next cycle will consist of a call on CD1 to let them know my new cycle started... clomid days 3-7, Menopur (if we decide to use it) CD7-12+, a monitoring scan on CD12 followed by a trigger (if my eggs are ready to go). Technically, this could be a tad cheaper than my previous cycles because of skipping the baseline scan... but if my scan on CD12 reveals follicles that aren't ready to trigger, I could end up with another scan (or two) before we can trigger.
Honestly, if money weren't a factor right now... I'd be forging ahead into the next cycle as we speak.
To add insult to injury... DD and I were at a marriage conference at a beautiful resort this weekend. I had "my friend" the entire weekend... UGH. AND every single session of the conference, no matter where we sat in the ballroom... I was surrounded by pregnant women.
I'm happy for these women... I really am. I don't know a single thing about their stories. Did they conceive the first month of trying after spending their entire adulthood avoiding pregnancy? Did they struggle with infertility? Were they "surprised" by this pregnancy? Wanted, unwanted, planned, unplanned, 1st baby or 12th?... they all have what I long for. I feel guilty for being jealous of their pregnant state.
Sometimes, I feel unjustified in my hurt over infertility. I did bring 3 beautiful children into this world and I gained 2 more via marriage to Devoted Daddy. I am the Mama to 5 kiddos... I will always be insanely busy... I will never have to make the choice to "live child free"... I fit in during the parenting sessions of the conference... I'm an infertile with a full nest.
And I'm still incredibly sad. I long for a child that I can look at and not see my ex or DD's ex... a child that I can look at and see the reflection of this man I love above all else. This man who is my glorious gift after so many years of destruction and heartbreak. I long for a child that will provide all of our children with a joint sibling... a child that will "close the circle" between His and Hers. I would desire these things even if I didn't absolutely adore children... if I didn't love the feeling of being pregnant (even though I was violently ill every time)... if I didn't believe that children are a blessing...
Devoted Daddy is convinced that we will have a baby together in time... I'm losing hope. I know that God is real... and that He is good. I also know that we live in a fallen world where bad things happen. Maybe God's plan for us is to love the orphans... to foster and adopt children that are unwanted... maybe God's plan is that I need to learn patience and that things don't come in my timing...
Or maybe, we just have the rotten luck of faulty plumbing. I've put my reproductive organs through all kinds of trauma since my first bout of (resolved) infertility.
In other news, I asked to be added to our clinic's embryo adoption program. The wait is long (two years or more) because there are many waiting families and not many embryos available. DD and I know that enlarging our family via embryo adoption would mean that the resulting child(ren) would not be of our DNA, but we would be granting life to a child suspended in time... and we would love that child(ren) with every fiber of our being. The irony is... we can go through a FET with adopted embryos for $3800 whereas a round of IVF would cost us $8850 + $2-3,000 in meds.
On my mind... IVF. It was something I wasn't sure I'd ever seriously consider. BUT, here we are... four failed cycles later. We are resting for at least this cycle, maybe two depending on finances. I've crunched the numbers... we have about $2500 left in insurance benefits and on October 1 our FSA account starts over. We could increase that to the maximum which is $5,000 (annually). This would enable us to have $7500 toward the $8850 cost of IVF in October (two months prior to my dreaded 35th birthday). IF (and it's a big IF) we can save the remaining $1350 and start rounding up the medications... maybe, just maybe... we could give it a go. If round one doesn't work BUT we have embryos remaining, we could wait a couple months and pay $1250 for a FET.
I know without a doubt, that even if we conceived triplets on IVF #1, we'd have to proceed with FET of any remaining embryos at the earliest possible time. I cannot allow the start of life to stay indefinitely suspended in time or be destroyed. We'd have to give every embryo (no matter the quality) a shot at life. Our only other option would be embryo adoption... but I think I'm one of those women that is attached to my eggs and would have a great sense of loss over allowing them to be raised in another family... and if none became children, I'd wonder if they would have had a different outcome if I had chosen to transfer them... Because I'm crazy like that. :-)
I have a prescription here for 10 vials (75iu) of Menopur + 15 clomid pills + 10,000iu of Pregnyl. I can buy the Menopur cheaply via IVFMEDS.com for $187.50, this is about a fourth of the cost of an American pharmacy. My clinic recommends the generic HMG and even gave me the order form, so I am comfortable using it.
However, I have to make a decision... try Menopur + clomid + HCG (in April or May) with IUI and potentially waste another $1500... or wait and save... and pray and hope...
Either way... I'm taking March off. Who knows, maybe we will get lucky on our own. I started the OPK today (First Response Daily), I like that this kit watches (and remembers) my personal levels of LH to detect my surge... since I have a short (and possibly weak) surge this is a good thing. I'm also diligently tracking my BBT, cervix position and CM. By taking March off, I can skip the day 3 ultrasound at my clinic and shave $470 off the next cycle. My RE only requires baselines in back to back medicated cycles.
Our next cycle will consist of a call on CD1 to let them know my new cycle started... clomid days 3-7, Menopur (if we decide to use it) CD7-12+, a monitoring scan on CD12 followed by a trigger (if my eggs are ready to go). Technically, this could be a tad cheaper than my previous cycles because of skipping the baseline scan... but if my scan on CD12 reveals follicles that aren't ready to trigger, I could end up with another scan (or two) before we can trigger.
Honestly, if money weren't a factor right now... I'd be forging ahead into the next cycle as we speak.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Cycle 4 Marches On... Hormones & Moods
Today is CD7 and I took my last dose of Clomid (150mg) today. My Pregnyl will arrive Friday. Monday (CD12), we go back to the clinic for a scan which will decide whether we trigger that day or wait a bit longer.
I've been a hormonal, emotional mess... it seems to get worse with each cycle (build up of medications?) and with the addition of HCG last cycle. I'm weepy... for the last week or so of my cycle I couldn't have a rational conversation... everything was overwhelming.
Anyway... time marches on... funds are dwindling. I'm pretty sure this is our last cycle for a while. I'll know more once the cycle is finished and I can look at the remaining funds. Either way, we will be taking a treatment break soon while we regroup and save. I feel like October will be the earliest we could tackle a fertility cycle again.
I'm really feeling the call to foster parenting. DD isn't convinced yet... but I think we may start tackling certification soon. Perhaps, my love for children is the very reason we haven't conceived... perhaps, God's plan is for us to love the orphans. I'm good with that.
I've been a hormonal, emotional mess... it seems to get worse with each cycle (build up of medications?) and with the addition of HCG last cycle. I'm weepy... for the last week or so of my cycle I couldn't have a rational conversation... everything was overwhelming.
Anyway... time marches on... funds are dwindling. I'm pretty sure this is our last cycle for a while. I'll know more once the cycle is finished and I can look at the remaining funds. Either way, we will be taking a treatment break soon while we regroup and save. I feel like October will be the earliest we could tackle a fertility cycle again.
I'm really feeling the call to foster parenting. DD isn't convinced yet... but I think we may start tackling certification soon. Perhaps, my love for children is the very reason we haven't conceived... perhaps, God's plan is for us to love the orphans. I'm good with that.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Cycle 4 Begins
Today is CD1... the start of our next cycle. We are going with the same routine as last cycle... baseline scan on CD3, clomid CD3-7, monitoring scan on CD12, Pregnyl 10,000 trigger injection when follicles are big and happy, followed by IUI 24 hours later.
The good news... we took in Devoted Daddy's swimmers for a check up on Monday, everything looks spiffy and we are good to go for this cycle... we just know that the 3 day abstinence is a MUST.
I'm still going for weekly acupuncture... I feel like I am getting more relaxed during treatment... almost like a heaviness over me, but I'm still semi-aware. Today, I didn't open my eyes at all during the treatment but I do remember sounds around me. It was a nice feeling.
I must say... the HCG trigger gave me some interesting PMS symptoms. My new cycle started 18 days post trigger (17 days post O)... so, my LP was longer than normal (could this be due to the higher progesterone with multiple follicles?). My ability to cope was limited the last few days to week... it's just not a good time to have a serious conversation with me. My sense of smell was heightened to an almost ridiculous level. I was tired... all the time.
I tested out the HCG shot on CD4 and CD5 with a digital test (I had freebies from my ovulation packs here). CD4 proclaimed "pregnant" (when I knew otherwise, evil device!)... CD5 was correct with "not pregnant". I tested again at CD11 and CD12 with First Response Early Tests... just in case we managed a miracle despite our low swimmer count... they were both negative, of course. When my LP reached 16 days, I was hopeful that I was in for a late positive... but my temp had dropped so I knew better.
Part of me wants to go on fertility vacation... quit worrying about it for a while. The practical part of me knows that I'm much to OCD and would still stalk my chart and obsess over the possibility... so it wouldn't be a break... it would just be no assistance.
That said... I'm surrounded by pregnant women lately. What's up with that??? Torture or signs of things to come... or just plain dumb luck...
The good news... we took in Devoted Daddy's swimmers for a check up on Monday, everything looks spiffy and we are good to go for this cycle... we just know that the 3 day abstinence is a MUST.
I'm still going for weekly acupuncture... I feel like I am getting more relaxed during treatment... almost like a heaviness over me, but I'm still semi-aware. Today, I didn't open my eyes at all during the treatment but I do remember sounds around me. It was a nice feeling.
I must say... the HCG trigger gave me some interesting PMS symptoms. My new cycle started 18 days post trigger (17 days post O)... so, my LP was longer than normal (could this be due to the higher progesterone with multiple follicles?). My ability to cope was limited the last few days to week... it's just not a good time to have a serious conversation with me. My sense of smell was heightened to an almost ridiculous level. I was tired... all the time.
I tested out the HCG shot on CD4 and CD5 with a digital test (I had freebies from my ovulation packs here). CD4 proclaimed "pregnant" (when I knew otherwise, evil device!)... CD5 was correct with "not pregnant". I tested again at CD11 and CD12 with First Response Early Tests... just in case we managed a miracle despite our low swimmer count... they were both negative, of course. When my LP reached 16 days, I was hopeful that I was in for a late positive... but my temp had dropped so I knew better.
Part of me wants to go on fertility vacation... quit worrying about it for a while. The practical part of me knows that I'm much to OCD and would still stalk my chart and obsess over the possibility... so it wouldn't be a break... it would just be no assistance.
That said... I'm surrounded by pregnant women lately. What's up with that??? Torture or signs of things to come... or just plain dumb luck...
Monday, November 28, 2011
Cycle #2
Well... on CD15 I was ready to bag this cycle and call it a wash.
I had not even the faintest hint of a line on the OPK... I was having pain, but it was different than the ovulatory pain I experienced in the previous cycle. My CM was inconclusive... it's always kind of milky in color, but appeared to be thinner and more watery... since I have severe scarring of my cervix I know that CM isn't a reliable indicator for me. My cervix had moved higher and seemed to be softening...
So... I called Dr. Awesome's office. They suggested I either wait a few more days to see if a surge shows up -OR- go in for a scan and possible trigger. I opted for the scan.
Scan shows 1 follicle on my right ovary, 26mm. We do a progesterone draw to confirm that we haven't missed ovulation. Progesterone is .84 indicating I have not yet ovulated as of 10:30 am on CD15.
Once I return home, OPK's start showing a surge. By early afternoon it is fully positive. We are scheduled the following morning for IUI.
CD16, my temp is UP (WHAT?). 10:15 am, we are in the RE's office... sample is prepped and IUI goes off a bit smoother than last cycle, although still quite painful. My cervix remained open enough to get the catheter through... slowly and painfully. Thankfully, they didn't have to break through the scar tissue again.
Today, I'm 3dpo... concerned we actually missed our IUI window. Wondering what a better method will be for the next cycle (a few months away). Also, concerned that I had one cycle of great response to clomid and this one is piddly.
We did BD w/ Pre~Seed evening of CD13, hopefully with my cervix open and the extra fluids some of those swimmers made it to where they belong. So... BD CD13, O CD15, IUI CD16... the IUI could still be productive if my O was in the few hours before I woke up... if it was during the day on CD15 we are probably out of luck unless those swimmers made there way and hung out from our romp on CD13.
The next two cycles are breaks... well, technically, I'm having surgery on Dec. 22 for the endometriosis, cervical stenosis, & bladder pain. I'm so excited to start the Christmas break with surgery. Depending on the outcome of the surgery, we will try naturally in January and possibly start IUI again in February (clomid or injectables or combination?).
I'll head in on Friday for a progesterone draw... to confirm that ovulation occurred and was strong enough. If my progesterone is low, I will be prescribed suppositories to use until AF shows.
I had not even the faintest hint of a line on the OPK... I was having pain, but it was different than the ovulatory pain I experienced in the previous cycle. My CM was inconclusive... it's always kind of milky in color, but appeared to be thinner and more watery... since I have severe scarring of my cervix I know that CM isn't a reliable indicator for me. My cervix had moved higher and seemed to be softening...
So... I called Dr. Awesome's office. They suggested I either wait a few more days to see if a surge shows up -OR- go in for a scan and possible trigger. I opted for the scan.
Scan shows 1 follicle on my right ovary, 26mm. We do a progesterone draw to confirm that we haven't missed ovulation. Progesterone is .84 indicating I have not yet ovulated as of 10:30 am on CD15.
Once I return home, OPK's start showing a surge. By early afternoon it is fully positive. We are scheduled the following morning for IUI.
CD16, my temp is UP (WHAT?). 10:15 am, we are in the RE's office... sample is prepped and IUI goes off a bit smoother than last cycle, although still quite painful. My cervix remained open enough to get the catheter through... slowly and painfully. Thankfully, they didn't have to break through the scar tissue again.
Today, I'm 3dpo... concerned we actually missed our IUI window. Wondering what a better method will be for the next cycle (a few months away). Also, concerned that I had one cycle of great response to clomid and this one is piddly.
We did BD w/ Pre~Seed evening of CD13, hopefully with my cervix open and the extra fluids some of those swimmers made it to where they belong. So... BD CD13, O CD15, IUI CD16... the IUI could still be productive if my O was in the few hours before I woke up... if it was during the day on CD15 we are probably out of luck unless those swimmers made there way and hung out from our romp on CD13.
The next two cycles are breaks... well, technically, I'm having surgery on Dec. 22 for the endometriosis, cervical stenosis, & bladder pain. I'm so excited to start the Christmas break with surgery. Depending on the outcome of the surgery, we will try naturally in January and possibly start IUI again in February (clomid or injectables or combination?).
I'll head in on Friday for a progesterone draw... to confirm that ovulation occurred and was strong enough. If my progesterone is low, I will be prescribed suppositories to use until AF shows.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Stress... AND Shingles?
I have shingles.
Related to TTC? Who knows. Generally, shingles can happen to anyone who has had chicken pox... the virus (varicella zoster) lays dormant in your body forever more and can be activated by STRESS.
It's incredibly painful... and I feel generally ill. I'm taking antivirals and using lidoderm pain patches over the rash. Putting the patches on is horrifically painful, but after about 10 minutes the pain improves. I can only leave the patches on for 12 hours so I've been going without at night. Funny, I'm not having difficulty sleeping... and I can lay on the side of the rash. It seems the steady pressure is bearable, but light friction is NOT. But, I do wake up VERY sore and don't want to move...
Evidently I can continue TTC... I'm right at the start of a new cycle and I'll be done with antivirals a week before ovulation. That said, the antivirals are considered safe during pregnancy (category B). I don't like to take even a Tylenol while I'm pregnant, so I'm glad the medicine will be done beforehand.
Yesterday I had my baseline ultrasound (CD3). I have a total of 16 anterior follicles. My uterus is clean and ready to go. I started clomid (150mg) yesterday, we are hoping 2-3 of those follies will mature and ovulate like they did last cycle. (It's great to know that my body starts with a good number of follicles, if we have to move onto IVF we know that injectables will mature all 16 of those follies.)
I'll begin using Clearblue OPK's on CD10, we are anticipating a CD14 ovulation again... which means IUI on Turkey Day! I'm still BBT charting, I like to confirm ovulation and watch for the length of my LP (and any variations). My temps are running a bit high due to the shingles virus AND clomid, so I may stop temping until CD8 (after clomid is done).
And that's about if for the next 10 days or so...
Related to TTC? Who knows. Generally, shingles can happen to anyone who has had chicken pox... the virus (varicella zoster) lays dormant in your body forever more and can be activated by STRESS.
It's incredibly painful... and I feel generally ill. I'm taking antivirals and using lidoderm pain patches over the rash. Putting the patches on is horrifically painful, but after about 10 minutes the pain improves. I can only leave the patches on for 12 hours so I've been going without at night. Funny, I'm not having difficulty sleeping... and I can lay on the side of the rash. It seems the steady pressure is bearable, but light friction is NOT. But, I do wake up VERY sore and don't want to move...
Evidently I can continue TTC... I'm right at the start of a new cycle and I'll be done with antivirals a week before ovulation. That said, the antivirals are considered safe during pregnancy (category B). I don't like to take even a Tylenol while I'm pregnant, so I'm glad the medicine will be done beforehand.
Yesterday I had my baseline ultrasound (CD3). I have a total of 16 anterior follicles. My uterus is clean and ready to go. I started clomid (150mg) yesterday, we are hoping 2-3 of those follies will mature and ovulate like they did last cycle. (It's great to know that my body starts with a good number of follicles, if we have to move onto IVF we know that injectables will mature all 16 of those follies.)
I'll begin using Clearblue OPK's on CD10, we are anticipating a CD14 ovulation again... which means IUI on Turkey Day! I'm still BBT charting, I like to confirm ovulation and watch for the length of my LP (and any variations). My temps are running a bit high due to the shingles virus AND clomid, so I may stop temping until CD8 (after clomid is done).
And that's about if for the next 10 days or so...
Monday, October 24, 2011
Having a Plan
I've felt better since we attended our Fertility Center appointment and met extensively with the wonderful staff there. I like having a plan... blame it on my OCD tendencies if you like.
I wasn't distraught when AF showed up after 37 days because I already knew I wasn't pregnant... I had a corpus luteum cyst that continued to produce progesterone (and some nasty symptoms). Since I was armed with knowledge, I was eager for AF so I could start on The PLAN.
I completed phase one of the plan on CD7 (Oct. 19th) with the completion of five days of 150mg clomid. I didn't experience any crazy side effects... just a few hot flashes (okay, more than a few) and I was a bit more fatigued (it was harder to get up in the mornings, but when isn't it?).
Today I am on CD12. I started using Clear Blue Easy OPK sticks on Saturday. No line to speak of yet but I am feeling more Pre-O like.
So now I'm testing and waiting... when I get the go (a test line that is almost as dark as the reference line but not quite positive), I'll call the clinic and get scheduled for first thing the following morning.
Other than the fact that I hate waiting (I'm an instant gratification person)... this is a good plan. It feels nice to have a plan.
I wasn't distraught when AF showed up after 37 days because I already knew I wasn't pregnant... I had a corpus luteum cyst that continued to produce progesterone (and some nasty symptoms). Since I was armed with knowledge, I was eager for AF so I could start on The PLAN.
I completed phase one of the plan on CD7 (Oct. 19th) with the completion of five days of 150mg clomid. I didn't experience any crazy side effects... just a few hot flashes (okay, more than a few) and I was a bit more fatigued (it was harder to get up in the mornings, but when isn't it?).
Today I am on CD12. I started using Clear Blue Easy OPK sticks on Saturday. No line to speak of yet but I am feeling more Pre-O like.
So now I'm testing and waiting... when I get the go (a test line that is almost as dark as the reference line but not quite positive), I'll call the clinic and get scheduled for first thing the following morning.
Other than the fact that I hate waiting (I'm an instant gratification person)... this is a good plan. It feels nice to have a plan.
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